Monday, December 4, 2023
What’s hard about love is understanding that it never holds on. It’s a strong bond, but not in a possessive way. Love’s bond is a loosening not a restriction. Years ago, I asked the universe to show me true love. If you don’t really want to know about true love, don’t ask for it. It’s going to take you from roses and butterflies to hell and back. But love allows for it all.
True love is acceptance, not a wishing for some other way. True love has no possessive qualities. This is the hardest one to understand because we often use the word “my” when describing our closest relationships. “My friend,” “My spouse,” or “My daughter.” Things that I consider “mine,” are under my subjection and control, except for people.
What really brings out love is freedom. Aren’t your best relationships ones that are nonrestrictive and without inhibition? We often forget to afford freedom to those we love the most. Why? Because we want to “keep them” in our lives. The best way to “keep” anybody is to allow them to come and go freely. It’s the “go” part that’s hard about that truth.
What if someone needed you “to be” a certain way? You need to be yourself. If someone expects you to be other than that, you’ll be playing a guessing game, tiptoeing around yourself and denying your truth. True love will never make you deny yourself. True love will come to you when you allow others to be who they are, especially when they make mistakes. The flowering of another can only happen when we give them space to be who they are. True love does not restrict the growth process of the individual. True love gives another freedom to grow as a person, even if it means you grow apart as a couple.