Friday, April 7, 2023
When I was about 6 years old, I wanted an Easy Bake Oven. Can you imagine how hard it must have been for a 6 year-old boy in 1981 with two brothers, to express a desire for a toy oven, marketed to girls? I also wanted tap shoes, and to have a Barbie Dream House. To top it off, as I matured, I realized inwardly that my sexual preference was for boys. Everything I wanted in my youth, natural and honest desires that came from my heart, became a source of pain and guilt. They were pressured by a conditional environment that punished such innocent, innate curiosity with ridicule and “normative” structures.
There is no such thing as an unconventional desire, if it’s not harmful or illegal! There’s a reason for it. It’s yours. When parents interfere with the natural interests and curiosities of their children, it screws up the hardwiring of the soul, which gives rise to desire, naturally. Interfering puts them into a confusing state, one that resonates the notion that they “should be this or that,” or “should want” this or that. I was one of them. I “shouldn’t have” wanted a Barbie Dream House, and believed that lie.
My parents were supportive, but social norms and the wider environment of an all-boy family, not so much. My suppression would eventually be set free. What do you need to set free? Do you have “guilty” desires? Do you have unknown curiosities? I believe our truest interests are meant to be discovered and set free, or our souls will decay. We’re too concerned about what others might think of what we want, so we suppress and follow the crowd. But what would happen if you followed your own desire? You’d be free. You’d be joyful. You’d develop a plan and a vision, then mount up like an eagle and enjoy discovering your truth.
Thank you, Ryan. Many people will benefit from reading this!