Monday, November 10, 2025
When you can be alone and not be lonely, you’ve discovered heavenly company. Loneliness is a desolate feeling, bereft of comfort, peace, and anchoring. You can’t seem to live with yourself. Who is this self with whom I can’t live?
So, I’ve got a feeling I’m not alone, or I feel lonely. I and the feeling are a couple. Suddenly, there seems to be two – me and my feeling. Am I the feeling? The feeler of the feeling, or that which knows myself to be a feeler feeling a feeling? Who is the knower which knows myself to be a feeler feeling a feeling?
Seems like nesting dolls. To know that I know myself to be a feeler feeling a feeling or a seer seeing a sight or a thinker thinking a thought. These nesting dolls of perception make my brain hurt. If I chase it up the chain of command or descend the staircase, I find a mirror held up to a mirror.
If I go up the chain, will I find God? If I go down the chain, will I find Satan? Up or down, I find myself – but who is this “I” that seeks “myself?” Damn – foiled again. I, me, and myself! I can’t find one, but two, three. In silence – I AM.
Am I alone? No-one else is here. Am I lonely? I have myself to keep me company. But who is I, who is myself, and who is me that is being accompanied? Maybe that’s the company of heaven. Maybe that’s the host of angels. “Let us make man in our image.” I always wondered why the book of Genesis uses “us” to describe singularity. There is no singularity without plurality. In silence I AM.
Ok then, we shall be a throuple. I, me, myself. In silence, bound together in one substance, I’m a non-lonely entity, filled with love, accompanied by infinite throngs. In silence, merely I AM.