Wednesday, July 15, 2026
Endurance is mistaken for tolerance. Tolerance seems forced. It’s unwilling, yet truce-like. It’s a mentality which bypasses the present moment merely because you “have to.” I will tolerate, but I will not engage, grow, or learn. I’ll just wait until it’s over. It’s like the worst sex you’ve ever had.
Tolerance feels like gritting through, accepting the side-by-side nature of what’s happening, rather than extracting the growth potential. It’s a “let’s-get-this-over-with” mindset. I’ll hunker down, but won’t progress. You can be there (close by), but leave me alone. It’s “Dutch-style” tolerance.
The Dutch are often considered tolerant. But I have close friends there who would say “to an extent.” They are tolerant from “afar.” It’s the old “separate but equal” idea disguised as liberalism.
To endure means that what you’re going through is beneficial, all of it, and all stages of it. Growing is enduring. More benefit is being extracted through what you might call “leaning into” an inconvenience. My trainer has been one of my greatest spiritual teachers. He’s taught me endurance. When I push a little, enough to feel the burn, I’m able to handle more. Then, more is given. The heart strengthens, not by avoiding, but by commingling. The muscles condition. The body is vibrant. It gives back.
You don’t tolerate, you endure. “Here we grow,” says one of the other trainers at my gym when her client starts a new set. We grow from here, not from “there.”
Endurance might be more like “separate and equal.” It’s not until we consciously reach across the aisle that we finally progress. It’s not until we initiate togetherness that we finally benefit. Tolerance gets to the line, hoping to “out survive” the “other.” Endurance goes through “enemy lines,” anonymously and subversively.
You can’t hunker down and out-endure your enemy. You must grow through and despite.
Here we grow. There we don’t. The benefits come when you fully engage here and now, no matter how repulsive the reflection seems.