The keys are in the darkness.

Thursday, April 4, 2023

The Streetlight Effect is about a drunk searching for his keys under a streetlight. A policeman approaches asking, “Where did you lose them?” The drunk replies, “in the park.” Bewildered, the policeman asks “why search here?” The drunk replies, “The light is better over here.” No-one wants to search in the darkness, but that’s the only place to find insight. It’s scary to go into the wilderness; but it’s where the Real search begins.

When I found out my now ex-husband had been unfaithful, I wanted to hurt him. I wanted to take his car; I wanted to write to immigration and declare our marriage fraudulent; and I wanted him to suffer. But my “Inner Parent,” as I call it, would not allow it. When I resigned from teaching, I wanted to wait and have a backup plan. I wanted to have a side hustle or some “safety net” to fall back on, but my “Inner Core” (new name) wouldn’t allow it. And now, I’m faced with what to do about income and supporting myself. I’m thinking I need “a job,” to sell my home, or to have some means to make ends meet. But “The Boss” as my friend calls it, wants me quiet and to be in the dark for a while longer. Can we please turn on a light!?

The Boss is taking you into the quiet darkness. Your petulant ego wants the lighted path. But the so-called easy, lighted path is not the way. Getting back at my husband, while appearing easy, would have created chaos. Staying in my job or clutching for money, same. You cannot disobey The Boss. It knows the way and the quickest route, but you must follow it into the darkness like a willing, innocent child who trusts his parent whole-heartedly. Are you searching in the light? If you are, you’ll never find your keys.