Friday, November 18, 2022
Stepping into a conflict to try to correct someone, to change their ways, or to get back at them for being “offensive” is like putting your finger on your own trigger. It’s so tempting, isn’t it? One who incites, finds a reason and/or justification for the way they feel about something or someone. Attention-getting is the primary objective of one who incites. No matter how you pull the trigger, it always draws attention towards you, as the one who is special, delicate, justifiably a victim, or different. Being right, being offended, being “the winner,” or being victimized are all dangerous pitfalls of the ego’s trigger-happy ways. When you pull the trigger, in essence you are looking for attention.
The world is made up of lonely people who are looking for safety, comfort, attention, and ultimately love. But the ego will look for attention in whatever form it can get it, even and especially in a conflict. To incite is to beg for attention. To blame others for your offense is a roundabout way of begging for compassion, a plea for help, masquerading in a story of discontent.
When you cast blame, misinterpret the situation, and seek justification, your actions are suicidal. And now in a plea, you want people to agree with your misinterpretation, and to have compassion on your misjudgment. There is no other reason for misinterpretation and overreaction, other than to get attention. The ego “sits” on the trigger, ready to find justification for an attention-getting action. But it ultimately shoots itself, unknowingly. Finding a reason to react is a way to incite. To incite is a roundabout way of getting pity, through self-infliction. To incite is to shoot yourself. Back away from the trigger, that’s insight. With insight, you’ll attract a different kind of attention, not pity but love.