Tuesday, October 19, 2021
Having a bad day? It’s probably someone else’s fault. Feeling lonely? Then it’s probably because someone else is too busy or not available. Feeling like people are rude, distant, and unfriendly? It’s because they are egotistical. Feeling pressured? It’s because people need too much from you. Feeling under-appreciated? It’s because people haven’t expressed a “thank you” for all of your effort. If only other people would change! Not so fast.
One of the easiest things to do as humans is to notice the so-called faults of others. Criticizing and blaming others is brainless, actually. Anyone can do it, and it requires no qualifications or actual skill. When you criticize others, it just makes you feel smug, superior, and blameless. But do you really need others to change, so that you can feel better about your situation? Do others need to behave a certain way before you feel good inside? Finding faults in others is nothing more than a justification for feeling poorly inside, and for holding onto those feelings, indefinitely.
When you notice something “wrong” with another, it’s a call to action. Blaming others is an inner signal that calls you to reflect on yourself. You may first have to make adjustments in your own attitudes and behaviors before others will be more friendly, cooperative, and kind. Fix your attitude before you expect others to do the same. Sober up, smile, and be friendly before you fall into the pattern of pointing fingers. If you feel others are mean, it’s a signal for you to do something nice. If you feel people are petty, it’s a signal for you to do something meaningful. If you insist that others are to blame, then fine – so be it. But it’s you that can actually affect change, right now. Be the one who makes positive change a priority, and you’ll never again have anyone else to blame.
Start each day by learning something about yourself!