Saturday, January 10, 2026
A first responder has been trained to enter a crisis and restore, to bring level headedness to a situation, to diffuse, and to keep things from escalating. They are fear effacing. The word efface, at its root, means to pardon; but literally, it means to erase or to make oneself appear insignificant.
How do you appear non threatening or insignificant when you talk of matters of the heart? If you are trying to make a point, or be right, it’s hard. If you are trying to point people to something that cannot be pointed to, in a literal way, first response is creative work.
A good first response might be saying nothing at all. Words inflame, but are sometimes necessary to coax a fear effacing presence, one that turns away from fear facing. Silence gives inflammation a prayer.
A good first responder has taught themselves to move, speak, write, and remain facing this oft-elusive fear-effacing presence. You’re not creeping around, as if an intruder is in your home. It’s a “no-sudden-moves” type of peaceful comportment. It’s not allowing the paranoia to arise, especially if the contents of your life appear provocative.
No matter what contents come into your awareness, a first responder’s first response is that contents don’t matter. Being content matters first. When allowance is a first response, no matter how undesirable a condition is, that space brings love, and the situation diffuses, heals, transforms, improves, or disappears.
“Let healing be,” says A Course In Miracles. A reaction is like a nuclear reaction, once unleashed, all hell breaks loose. A first responder understands that all hell “breaking loose” can be prevented. But a first responder stands at the gates of hell itself and bars the doors, not with force, but with a pardoning Love.
At bay, hell hath no fury.
What’s your first response?