Saturday, July 17, 2021
To what extent are you addicted to approval? Sometimes we can get lost in the anxiety and despair of assessment, both self-assessment and in what we think that others think of our actions and behaviors. All of this assessment is destructive. I believe we have created an insidious social media culture which has exploited our herd instincts as humans. We have become addicted to virtual approval, rather than to fulfilling our purpose of building real community with each other. Our sense of self-worth and dignity is erroneously wrapped in the illusion of what others think, demarcated by pressing a “like” button on a computer screen. How many times people press that button has become the metric of human value. But real value is not indicated by what you’ve done or accomplished, but by who you are as a human. An honest nature will gain an honest approval of others, who will grow to love you, genuinely and intimately. There is no reason to “earn” this by doing what you think pleases others. True human approval is a byproduct of being a loving person, plain and simple. And the metric of such approval is in the present-moment experience that you share (not virtually) with others.
Placing your value in the assessment of what you think others think is the world’s biggest waste of time and mental energy. Chose things, people, and activities that make you proud of you, not for the sole purpose of gaining approval of others. It’s not the number of “likes” that you get from people on social media – it’s the quality of what you like about yourself that matters. Like yourself through what you desire. Like yourself in how you act – your attitude. Like yourself through how you treat and appreciate your body. Like yourself in the energy you give to others. Like yourself in your own company. Don’t get addicted to the reactions of others. Focus in on reacting positively to who you are and the choices that you make for your own fulfillment and meaning. Reclaim the power of being your biggest fan. It’s the only “like” that you’ll ever truly need, and you wont ever need to “share” that with anyone on social media.