Tuesday, October 7, 2025
Many of us don’t know what we want. But if you examine this sensation of “not knowing what you want,” you get into a bunny hole. Not knowing what you want is like not knowing what to write. That’s called writer’s block.
You think you can’t express yourself. But you’re lying. Saying, “I don’t know what I want,” is a way of expressing yourself. If you were going to elaborate on that as a writer, you could. It gives you something to explore – this sensation of not knowing what to write about. You can write about not knowing what you want.
In saying, “I don’t know what I want,” there’s a split: There’s the first “I” that knows that there is a second “I” that doesn’t seem to know what it wants. Did you catch it? “I don’t know what I want.” This is a way of saying you do know. The pronoun “I” takes on two.
“I don’t know what Ryan wants.” “Ryan doesn’t know what I want.” “Ryan doesn’t know what Ryan wants.” Do you see how this gets weird?
Who does the wanting and who does the knowing or not knowing of this wanting? Which one is truly you? The one who desires, or the one who knows the desiring? I don’t know what I am talking about. In that sentence, there is an I that doesn’t know and there is an I that talks. It’s a mystery that both are me.
Who understands who? Who desires? Who understands the desire? Who knows or doesn’t know what is wanted or not wanted? You are a mystery to yourself, yet completely integrated as a singular creature.
Inscribed on the Temple of Apollo at Delphi are the famous words, “Know Thyself.” Good luck everyone.