Negative feelings are like bullies.

Saturday, November 2, 2024

When we feel negative emotions, not wanting them only seems to amplify them. I think there is this part of us that not only feels, but that knows that we’re feeling. I’ve always known there is a subconscious, but until I just looked it up, I didn’t know that we also have a superconscious. There is that part of us that knows that we know and that is aware that we are aware. What allows us to recognize negative feelings is their closest and nearest relatives – positive emotions.

Everything in the human mind is relative. In order to know inside we must know outside. To know up is to know down, so to recognize a negative feeling is to know its positive counterpart, which temporarily hides when we’re feeling angry or afraid.

I have found the only way to console a negative feeling is to recognize it first, from a superconscious perspective, then sit with it, and feel it. As you relax and bring cognition to it, the sharp edges of the emotion begin to soften. As you soften and dissolve, the feeling does too. It starts by recognizing the feeling, naming it, and simply just feeling it. Then miraculously, you can feel new feelings if you wish. You can recall positive thoughts in that moment of awareness, which further deteriorates the negative feelings.

The initial response to a negative feeling is “I don’t want this,” or fight or flight response. That only accentuates it, and it digs in. Rather than pushing it away, sink into it. Relax into it, and notice that it cannot really hurt you. Negative feelings are like bullies. If you try to run from them, they flare up and pursue. But if you stand up to them, in a non-aggressive, attentive way, they back down and diminish.